The Beginning

I am finally caving.

The past eighteen years of my life have been an amazing journey. Starting on the day I choose my path and it chose me right back. They day I dedicated myself to a higher power. "As long as I was on the front lines of spiritual warfare", a fifteen year old Matthew proclaimed to the wind, "I dedicate my life to your will."



A lot has changed since those awkward teenage days, but not that vow. My understanding of it grew as I did. It seemed once I said these heartfelt words the universe set me on a path to become just that. Looking back, it still seems like  the few years following were atypical. I was bombarded with multiple opportunities to learn more about people and how they work, the various ways they can get in their own way and the equally various ways to help.

I saw life through the eyes of a high-school dropout, a soldier, an honor student and as homeless man each in its season. Deep and profound transformation was happening within me and who was around me. It was an intense, beautiful, terrifying, and necessary time in my life.

One of the things that I would and still hear from the people I connect with in this way was/is "You must write a book. The things you have to say, people need to hear it." It was an idea that I was very resistant to.  I felt writing down ideas that I was taught was giving myself airs, exalting the messenger over the message.  I was worried that if I did start anything that might actually contribute to my well being based on this part of my life would cause me to lose it.

A materially successful friend, one of my best actually, challenged me to be in the world.  The challenge was for one year to get a job and develop tangible resources and support  and be responsible for something earthly, as he said due to that being the only element I did not have as an ally.  I agreed.  And I started looking for a place that I would start a career.

I found the best possible job I could find for a person like me; helping people, mental stimulation, freedom (relatively speaking). The best possible job for me that is out there is not that great of a fit for me. So...

I cave...I will not be writing a book, but I am in the research and development stage of creating a website, dedicated to writing articles on what I have learned and am learning.  To reach a many people as possible.

This website will be monetized. No there will not be pop-ups or subscriptions, but contextual ads based upon whatever article is showing. And the occasional recommendation or review of something. But profit is not what fuels the fire that is driving me in this, the need to connect and share my passion, my bliss, for personal spiritual growth.

The earth element, huh? Well I guess the only way the earth has any sustaining life is to plant some seeds and water and tend them. I am usually all for jumping off cliffs and learning how to fly on the way down, but I am doing some heavy research into the technologies and techniques involved in the creation for this site.  I mean I will have to write for search engines too and learning to do that without sacrificing any essential part of my writing. HTML, RSS, SEO, and various other necessary evils will fill my nights..

In fact, one of my greatest hints that I was really going to do this and keep at it until it is something grand was that I was researching this in depth on my leisure time. That I was choosing to do this over any other entertainment.  In fact I already feel it is done...I just have to do it!